You Have Been Watching ...

I AM A FATHER OF TWO!!!!!11!!1!!!!!11!!

I am a father of two!!!! It is a girl!!! She is lovely!!!! All other babies are inferior (apart from the one I had four years ago, who was equally brilliant)!!! Mine are best!!!!! I have a million photos of her asleep!!!! She held my finger!!!!! It was amazing!!!!!

(And as a side note, is there any document less studied than an emergency medical consent form? Not even the terms and conditions of the Adobe Acrobat Updater are read less often. Absolutely nobody is poring over it thinking "Yes, but does it affect my statutory rights?" Thankfully, all is well though.)

Guess What?

If you guessed that we have had a baby and moved house then you still have three more guesses.

If you guessed that we had not had a baby, but have moved house, then you still have two more guesses.

If you guessed that we have had a baby, but not moved house, then you still have one more guess.

If you guessed that the baby doesn't know the meaning of the word 'deadline' and that I would gladly strangle one particular party in our property chain with my bare hands then you win £5. (Is there anyone in England and Wales who, after buying or selling a house, has said "Yep, that's a great system - I can't think of a single way of improving it"?)

In fact, just go back exactly four years and re-read the archives as it is all exactly the same - we have avoided the September 11th birthday, I have successfully had my pre-baby haircut for the photos, and it looks like our children will be sharing a birthday, which will make things easy to remember.